Item review and how I got our money refunded
For those of you who didn’t know, we live in Le Smidlap Chateau located in Buffalo, NY, USA. We get a fair amount of snowfall in the city but this 2025 winter was less snowy and unusually cold (for us). Cold temperatures means having a hard time starting your car sometimes. We don’t keep our cars in a garage we do not have so we are stuck with them outdoors in the driveway. It is a little inconvenient brushing and scraping snow and ice and I swear if we ever sell Le Smidlap Chateau and leave town our next place will have a garage. We are both getting a little old for this bullshit but that is a story for another time. Let’s talk about how we came to want/need a portable jump starter.
A couple of months ago in January temperatures here at home went down to single digit Fahrenheit degrees. My trusty 2014 Mazda 6 started up just fine and I went off to my thankless J.O.B. like usual around 7:00 AM. However, Mrs. Smidlap owns a diesel automobile, a 2012 Jetta Wagon. I wrote about buying it back in 2019. The Jetta has been petty reliable with just a couple of instance of it not starting in cold weather. We have done the diligent maintenance like replacing the glow plug and even buying a new battery last summer and we are happy to have a decent 2nd car. However, on this occasion it was so cold it would not start. I think one problem with the failure to start is not using the car for days at a time. She doesn’t need to drive at speed on the highway often and mostly is just “around town” to run errands. So…the beast was dead.
When this had happened a couple of times in the past (before we replaced the battery) I was able to come home from work and jump start her car. I have good long high quality jumper cables but the task really is a pain in the nuts especially when the temps are so low. It usually takes us a long time to get enough charge to get the car charged enough to start. Twenty minutes feels like a long time when you would rather be in the warm house drinking wine! I suggested she call roadside assistance that is included with our expensive-ass insurance policy. She checked it out and read the policy and it was indeed complimentary aside from paying the service guy a tip.
We had considered a portable modern jump starter and the service call sealed the deal
Mrs. Smidlap called roadside service and explained her needs for a jump start. The operator/dispatcher told her it would take a couple of hours to get to our house, typical for a bitter cold and snowy day when lots of people have the same issue. The surprise came when the service guy finally showed up. We was not driving the typical tow truck but arrived in a minivan with just one of the portable jump starter/chargers we had been considering. Turns out that dude can make money likely going around with a 5 gallon gas can and a portable jump starter the size of a large brick. He told the Mrs. hers was about the 12th car of the day he had started with that device. Our only mistake was not asking him what make/model he was using. She told me when he hooked the started up her diesel started up immediately like a bat out of hell.
So, not knowing what model jump starter we wanted for our own I started down the research/review rabbit hole. One important consideration for us was the ability to restart a cold (albeit small) diesel engine in cold weather. It turns out a diesel takes a bit more cranking power than a similar size gasoline engine. This video from Project Farm on the YouTube was the best I came across and the goofy host explains all you need to know in this comprehensive review of lithium ion battery packs.
I ordered the GooLoo and it was stolen from our porch. Doh!
I ended up settling on the GooLoo GP4000 for the power/value proposition of the device. The cheapest I found it online was at WalMart for delivery for just under 100 bucks total with tax. It only took two days for delivery but the delivery person did not opt to ring our doorbell when he dropped the item at our front door. We went to bed not knowing our battery pack was sitting outside in the light snow and I woke up the next morning to head off to my thankless J.O.B. and was footprints in the fresh snow and a bare square where the package resided for a short time.
This scene made it pretty obvious some shit-head had stolen our stuff. Sometimes I want to ask one of these perpetrators what made them such a thieving devious shit-head. Was it lack of parental guidance? But I digress. I arrived at work and read an email about my package having been delivered. I followed the tracking from some minor league shit-head shipping company and there was a photo of our item right where the bare patch of stone is in the snow. Why they didn’t right the bell I don’t know but in the future Mrs. Smidlap told me to hand out her cell phone number (I proudly do not have a phone) and she would get the text alert when an item is delivered. I guess she does not mind being bothered by crap like this so we’ll employ her suggestion in the future.
Anyhow, I contacted the shipper by email and they told me to go fuck myself (paraphrased) and then I contacted WalMart by phone. That agent told me WalMart would refund my money and 10 minutes after I hung up I got an email saying they took back the refund offer and I could go fuck myself. “Take it up with your credit card provider” was their essential message.
I started the purchase protection via my Chase Freedom Unlimited Card. This Chase card has been excellent over the 8 years I have used it. I get 1.5% cash back and no annual fee. In addition they have been very good with a couple of unauthorized purchases a few years back. We have never paid them a penny of interest and have received several thousand in cash back rewards. I expected a similar positive experience with this purchase protection claim. In case you are interested in a really good credit card for yourself this is a referral for a Chase Freedom Unlimited card. If you get one be sure and try hard to pay off your balance in full each and every month. In fact, don’t try, just do it!
In the meantime I reordered my GooLoo (what a stupid name, right?) from Amazon. I got it for nearly the exact same price. The retail was supposedly around $170 from each merchant and under $100 seemed like a good deal. The item arrived and we fetched it un-stolen by shit-heads and unpackaged it like Christmas morning. It was mostly charged but we plugged it in to charge via a common USB type charger and we had 5 full lights illuminated solidly in a couple of hours. The battery pack will also charge devices like phones, tablets, and computers in the event of power outage so that is an added benefit.
About a week after we got our new GooLoo the temps turned cold again and sure enough the Jetta Wagon would not start when I was already at work. Mary Begley told me she went outside and followed the simple instructions to jump start the car. She reported the car roared to life like a wildcat! Easy peasy. We intend to keep the thing in the house and stored at a room temperature as these devices work best if not frozen or overheated if left stored in a car. When we travel out of town we’ll just toss it in with the rest of our luggage and have it when we need it. The device only weighs about 4-5 pounds and you can easily move it around with one hand and it has a nice bright light in case you need to use it at night to hook it up. This is the Amazon affiliate link in case you want to buy one for yourself. We should have bought one years ago.
OK. We have our item and now we want our original money back
The purchase protection from Chase was completely unfamiliar to me so it was a bit of a process to even get started. I began on the credit card site and then followed a link to an Assurant insurance company. I uploaded some documents like screenshots of the original purchase on my Chase card, the suspicious bare square in the snow, and the “go fuck yourself” email from the merchant (TwatMart). They really wanted a police report but I felt like it was too late and really did not want to bother a real officer to this petty theft. This was one more chance to learn. After waiting and waiting (it took several days each time I uploaded more information) I finally spoke to a very professional representative a few weeks into the process. It turns out the police report was the lynch pin in the whole refund/purchase protection process.
I was a little naive in the beginning not knowing you could file a simple police report online for situations like this. I finally took that step and it took a couple of days for that police report to be approved in the system. I uploaded the report to Assurant and got a message a day later my refund was approved! This for me is just more good Karma in the bank for our Chase relationship. I am also glad I filed the report just so it can add to the neighborhood stats and police attention goes where it is needed. Our neighborhood is pretty great overall but apparently other neighbors have report similar petty larceny events. You have to report them. Here is the happy ending, just like the special massage.
Let’s review what I learned
These modern jump started/battery packs are very useful for a good price. Some are better for appliances during power outages (including some with a regular A/C outlet) and others like the GooLoo are better for starting automobiles.
Purchase protection works. Ours covers up to $500 apparently. Just use a little patience and stay with it.
File that police report if you get ripped off by shit-heads. It is easier than you think.
Have you every used one of these battery pack jump started on cold weather? When your stuff gets stolen from our property did you file a report online?
I miss these type of posts. Give us more of this 'daily bullshit of life' content!